“Something by Now” - a song about passing time
Here is a new song, “Something by Now”, and some of what went in to making it. You can travel down that story and process as much as you’d like. Below is a video, thoughts, some voice memos, and lyrics. I plan to slowly do this to my entire catalog to capture songs in a moment. They slowly change as I play them out live, and if I take them to the studio they will change once again.
Backstory
2020. Never have I felt both the fear of losing time and an abundance all at once. I would have days where I would just pace the floor, waiting for something to change, anything. All this time and nothing to do. Then I would look at the clock and realize I just wasted an afternoon. Over and over I would make this dance a routine.
As a musician I have always felt that I am running out of time for some reason. Like I can only write songs while I am young, one day I will hit a point where my old bones just can’t do it anymore. While this may be true, it’s not tomorrow, it’s not next year, and hopefully it won’t be for decades. I’m not sure where this notion that only someone young, a prodigy, teens and twenties, can make it as a musician, but I am working on tearing that internal narrative to pieces. So what, I didn’t fall in love with songwriting until my late 20s, but it’s mine just the same.
“Something By Now” is a song I wrote one morning while doing some journaling, it came to me while thinking about the places I have been and where I will one day be. Regardless of where this road takes me, I know that I want to keep having adventures, which the last verse nods to.
I originally was going to cut out the “21” verse and start at “32”, as I felt odd starting a song thinking of a version of myself before songs started knocking, and also that 54 was still too young to give the song closure… but I kept it.
Writing Process
So this is something I would like to catalog for myself, but also for anyone interested in how I personally write a song. I get things in two ways typically, either a small melody or guitar part (like a seed), that I have to nurture into something… or like a bolt of lightning and I have to catch it before it disappears.
This song was more like a seed. It still comes fast, like the tree is going to grow no matter what, and if I am not there listening, it will just shrivel up. I have always thought of myself as more of conduit that anything else. The Roman’s had an interesting way of thinking of creators, that folks “had” a genius, not were one. Like a guardian angel that would help guide you to that next masterpiece. I like thinking that way, like a creative force is slipping me songs under the table.
Typically I turn on voice memos on my phone while I am working up a new tune and then every time I feel like that song gets to a “new place” I start a new recording. This one had 4 stages.
**Now it will take a strong stomach and mind to have to sit and listen to these messy audio recordings, but it’s also kind of neat to watch it unfold.
Notebook Page.
Thursday, Feb. 25th
Lyrics
I’m 21, closer to the figured it all out
The nights for fun, tomorrows can wait another day
All that thinking, interrupts the drinking
All that drinking needs minds to kill
I’m 21, thought I’d know something by now
I’m 32 , stuck somewhere in the middle
Don’t know what to do, Don’t like where I’m going or where I’ve been
Maybe I’ll pick up one more job
Find some money, and a thing to love
I’m 32, thought I’d know something by now
Still have these strings and a head of songs
Keep on dancing till our teeth are long
Time keeps ticking, time keeps ticking on
I’m 43, colors aren’t as bright as they were before
No family, no kids running round the house
Maybe I’ll do up my dirty hair
Put on something nice and go somewhere
I’m 43, thought I’d know something by now
Still have these strings and a head of songs
Keep on dancing till our teeth are long
Time keeps ticking, time keeps ticking on
I’m 53, still hear adventure call my name
Not sure what’s in store, I’ll keep heading on that way
Stop counting, the years that go
My book of stories, all I can control
And like before, thought I’d know something by now